Just a few thoughts

Just a few thoughts for the day...
I miss my mom.
I miss having cell phone service anywhere I go.
I miss my happy kids(they are really grouchy today).
OK, now I just have to tell a little story. On Thursday Braxton went to a 4H/Scout camp. He was excited to go but I wasn't too excited for him to go. Even when I dropped him off I was trying to talk him into staying. He said he would be ok and gave me a kiss and told me to not worry. I didn't know what was wrong with me, but I just did not want him to go. I chalked it up to being the pregnancy and went about my business. Lia had a ball game that night and I told Braxton's leader that if we weren't home when he got home to just have him come in and lock the door and wait for us. She said they would be home around 7pm. So, at 7:15 I started worrying. I really thought he would have been home by then. Anyways, we were outside when Lisa pulled up to our house and said, "I have an injured boy for you." My heart dropped. I was expecting blood and a trip to the ER. What I found was a swollen ankle that I swear was almost as big as my leg. It was so swollen and he could not walk at all. I had Vita help me get him to the house and he layed on the couch. One of Vita's friends was here so Vita went back outside and then the tears came from Brax. He was worried that his dad would think he was a baby. I told him that nobody thought he was a baby and we would see what we needed to do. At one point I asked Brax if he wanted me to go get the extra mattress so he could lay down in the living room since he couldn't make it down to his room. He got huge tears in his eyes and said, "No Mom, please, I don't want my brother to die. I have already lost 3 brothers, I can't loose another one." I was so shocked and couldn't believe he just said that. I asked him what made him say that and he said that if I was to carry the mattress I would loose his brother. At that point in time I realized how selfish I have been. I always worry about loosing this baby and say, "I can't do this again." but I haven't really thought about my kids loosing another one. I told Brax that the baby is just fine and if he ever has any questions he could just ask me. I told him he is too much like his dad and keeps everything inside. He just hugged me so tight and didn't want to let me go. Vita ended up rubbing his ankle for most of the night and he said he felt better. The next day Vita and I had to take the kids from work up to Ogden for the air show. So the kids spent the day with Grandpa Rod. They had a blast. We got home at about 11:15pm and Brax was awake. I asked him what he was doing and he asked, "has my brother been moving around ok? Are you guys ok?" I told him yes and he said that made him feel better. What a cute son we have. He truly does have a heart of gold. He makes us so proud and we are so thankful for him. I know he is going to love having this new little brother around. I hope they always stay close. Oh, and by the way, we have officially made it to 20 weeks! What an accomplishment. It makes me feel better to know that if anything does happen, now they will try to save him. We are getting ready to head to California on Monday. We can't wait. I am definitely ready for some sunshine and relaxation! The kids can't wait to see all their cousins. I am hoping that the girls decide not to argue and have a good day today:)